


Poems Out of Silence

by jjtaylor



Category: Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1
Genre: F/F, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-12-18 06:29:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11868603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jjtaylor/pseuds/jjtaylor
Summary: Sam's already been host to a Tok'ra once. The second time should at least be a little easier. Of course, it's anything but.





	Poems Out of Silence

**Author's Note:**

> It's a little disingenuous to call this a WIP. It's a giant monster draft that I'm breaking into chapters in the attempt to trick myself into finishing it. Read along if you're patient and/or desperate for a Tok'ra AU of that one season where Sam was on Atlantis.

_**Then** _

_When I am dead, even then,_  
I will still love you, I will wait in these poems,  
When I am dead, even then  
I am still listening to you.  
I will still be making poems for you  
out of silence;  
silence will be falling into that silence,  
it is building music. 

_\- Muriel Rukeyser_

 

Sam opens her eyes and sees light through the cloth pulled over her head, but nothing more. She tries to tell what kind of facility she's in by the hum around her, but she realizes it sounds more like a hyperdrive, which means she's on a ship. A ship experiencing some problems with its inertial dampeners, and as well as the cascading sounds of being fired upon. She feels decidedly unwell, and what's more, like she's out of something. Time her brain offers, but its more likely blood, if the sticky substance her fingers find all over her leg is anything to go on. Janet is going to be so mad.

Except that, no. Sam's not sure why she thought that. Janet's been gone for four years. It's almost the anniversary. 

One of the sideways tilts of the ship knocks Sam down, and the pain from falling on her injured leg makes her black out, but she thinks its just for a few seconds because she can still feel the reverberations of the fire the ship is taking. She yanks off her blindfold.

She's on a Wraith ship. It's immediately obvious; nothing quite looks like the living walls, blue and gray with channels of veins. 

There's someone pounding on the door and Sam goes abruptly still. It could be rescue; it could be something worse.

"Colonel Carter?" Teyla calls through the door after another round of pounding. 

Sam answers and Teyla says, "Dr. McKay is trying to open the door," in a tone less for Sam's assurance and more to tell Rodney to hurry up.

"Yes, yes, yes, just a minute," Rodney snaps, but a second later, the door opens. Rodney and Teyla rush forward and then the whole ship starts to shake again with a new round of weapons fire.

"What's going on?" Sam asks. Rodney's already working at the control panel in the middle of the room. 

"Dart," Rodney says, “swept us off the planet...." He looks at his watch, then looks away. It's clearly broken. "Well, a couple of hours ago, at least."

"You are injured," Teyla observes.

"What did they do to you?" Rodney says, trying to both hack the control panel and look at Sam at the same time. 

"I don't know," Sam says. Her memory offers up only fragments of images. Sam thinks she must have a head injury, because there's no reason to be thinking of the things she's thinking, so clearly, so out of place in her mind. Surprising Janet with coffee while she checked Junior's vitals, the extra squeeze Janet would give her whenever she tied the tourniquet to take her blood after a mission. Janet peering over Sam's shoulder in the mirror to do her mascara and shoving Sam playfully out of the way. Janet's ridiculous oatmeal breakfasts with more toppings than an ice cream sundae. When Cassandra found out about the Earth custom of Mother's Day. Janet's last kiss on her forehead when they thought they had forever. Janet's voice, loud, like it was right there, calling for her. Samantha, Sam, Sam. 

"Colonel Carter?" Teyla says. Her hand is tight on Sam's shoulder and she realizes she's had her eyes closed. "Are you sure you're all right?"

"Must have hit my head," Sam says, "And I think I've lost a lot of blood."

Rodney's head snaps up at that. Teyla tries to see if she can make any further assessment on the state of the wound on Sam's leg. 

"Did Atlantis find us?" Sam says. "We don't have anything that can fire like that except the Daedalus."

"Well, I hope it's our side because I'm about to call them for help," Rodney says. "Here, hold this," he tells Sam, and points to an exposed power conduit he’s hooked up to the radio. A battery of weapons fire hits again and Rodney's tossed onto the ground, hitting his head hard.

"McKay!" Sam shouts. 

"I'm fine, I'm fine," he says, though the cut on his head is bleeding into his eye and he's still on the floor. "Call them," Rodney says. “I'll sit up in a second.”

“Daedalus, come in. This is Lt. Colonel Carter, please respond." She hears the fuzzy return of static and garbled words. It's better than nothing. She adjusts the controls. "This is Carter, please come in, we are aboard the ship you're firing on."

"We know, Colonel," Lorne's voice responds. “Sorry about that.” The ship's rocked by another wave of battery fire.

" - are you there, Colonel?  - trouble -  lock on to your coordinates, can you - "

The door gives way and two Wraith enter firing. Sam ducks as the energy blast blows up the comm system she was just using. She hears the transmission cut out in between the first two blasts. A third sets the wall to her right on fire, acrid burning smoke flooding the room. She’s barely covered her face against the smoke when the blinding white light envelops her as she, Teyla, and McKay are beamed aboard the Daedalus. Someone shouts urgently for a medic and she breathes out slow with relief and rests her feverish forehead against the cool of the metal floor. 

 

When Sam wakes up, she's surprised to find it’s in her own bed. She’s glad; waking up in the infirmary is always worse, like time is paused. Staying for observation, while a familiar thing after 10 years at the SGC, still reminded her of her weakness. This morning, her sheets under her, the warm glow of Atlantis lights, makes the cold blue, the weapons fire on the Wraith ship fade away. She gets into the shower, the warm water turning on with a swipe of her hand over the controls. She already feels better.

She's just finished braiding her hair is pulling on her uniform jacket when the alert sounds. She radios to the control room, but no one there knows who started the alert, only that its the intruder alarm in Section Four of the north wing.

"Sheppard, come in," she says.

Sheppard's breathy reply tells her he's running, though some of his exclamations it sounds more like after something rather than from something. "Sorry to wake you, Colonel, we thought we had the situation under control."

"Situation? There's not an intruder?"

"Oh, there is," Sheppard says. "Just the eight-legged kind."

'What?" Sam says. She calls the control room. "Lock down the Gate," she says. Chuck asks why, but she doesn't have time to answer, because McKay's on the radio.  
"Sheppard?" he shouts. "Carter?"

"What's going on, McKay?" Carter asks.

Sheppard talks over her. "You have the trap?"

"Yes, I have the trap, but its not doing any good if I can't see what I'm trapping," McKay bites back.

Sam catches up with John and Rodney coming around a corner. Rodney is carrying something that looks like a crate in one hand and a naquadah generator in the other.

"Tell me this isn't about what I think it is," she says.

"If you think it's about an invisible dog squid, then yes, it is," Sheppard says. 

Ronon comes running down the hall from the other direction, Teyla behind him. "I saw Scout go that way," Ronon says. He freezes when he sees Sam.

"Scout? You mean your pet dog, which you promised me you'd return to PX3-454 two days ago?" Sam says. "From the planet where the capital city is invisible? That Scout?"

"Turns out Scout's also invisible," Sheppard says.

"He wasn't when I brought him back!" Ronon protests.

"And who sounded the intruder alert for an invisible dog?"

"It has eight legs," Rodney says. "Which makes it fast."

"We believe the city sounded the alarm on its own," Teyla sensibly cuts in. "Scout apparently registers as a different sort of life sign when he is invisible.”

"It's a form of energy," Rodney starts, "He turns his body to - "

Sam cuts him off before he can start his explanation. He looks hurt.

"Did you have to name it?" Sam says. "It's going to make it even harder to bring it back, everyone knows that."

Ronon actually looks a little sad. 

"We might as well start closing off parts of the city. McKay, can you come up with something so we can see him, some modification for the life signs?"

Rodney scoffs, and hands Sam the tablet he's had tucked under his arm. A flashing dot that's moving fast down the north wing. Rodney's made the dot have a wagging tail. 

"See if we can get Lorne's team to help us. I think this is a situation where we could use a crowd. Do me a favor if you can and don't tell them it's a dog?"

Sheppard nods and turns away to talk into his radio. After a moment, the intruder alarm stops. Sam's head rings a little in the silence. She feels herself stagger for a minute and its weird, because she feels fine, not dizzy at all. Teyla catches her at her elbow and steadies her, gives her a concerned look.

"Are you all right, Colonel? Perhaps you might sit this one out, if you are still tired from your ordeal yesterday."

"I'm fine," Sam says, but she's staggering again. “No. Something's wrong .” Sam feels her vision blur for a second and she wouldn't believe it if she didn't see it reflected back at her in the shiny window glass. Her eyes flash yellow. 

"Did that just happen?" Sam says, "Or am I hallucinating?"

Rodney is frozen, mouth agape.

"If you mean, did we just see your eyes flash yellow like one who is possessed by a Go'a'uld," Teyla says, "Then yes."

Ronon pulls out his pulse pistol. Sheppard is staring at her with a curious look. “Turn the intruder alarm back on, Chuck, would you? Thanks," Sheppard says into his radio. 

_Tok'ra_ the voice inside her head says.

"I need to speak with the Tok'ra High Council," Sam says, though it is not her voice. She tries to head for the control room, but Ronon stops her with a tight grip on her shoulder.

Finally, the dizziness is too much and Sam's falling. Teyla catches her before she crumples. The same voice as before is back in her head, weak and distant. My name is – was – Janet. It’s more than enough to knock Sam all the way out.

 

Rodney is setting up a portable comm station by Sam's bed in the infirmary. She tried to convince Keller to let her be wheeled to her office, but she understands the unspoken - they don't want her too close to the Gate Room. Rodney won't look at her. He’s grumbling to himself about how he should have had an assistant do this, but no one had high enough security clearance. When Sam says his name, he tenses.

"What?" he bites out without looking at her, and continues attaching wires to a tablet.

"Rodney, I get that you're freaked out," Sam says. Her words are slow and thick.

"Oh, me, freaked out? No, no. I'm totally OK with the fact that you are possessed."

"Rodney, that's enough," Sheppard says. Rodney resumes his grumbling under his breath.

Sheppard takes a seat on one of Keller's medical stools. There are two marines around Sam's hospital bed, though they’re a respectful distance away. There are four more at the door. She knows Ronon is on the other side. 

"Sorry to put you through this, Colonel, but the SGC's having trouble believing me."

"What did you tell them?" Sam asks. She's pleased the words aren't so slurred as to be incomprehensible.

Sheppard shakes his head. 'Well, I asked for General Landry. He was in a meeting, so they gave me Mitchell, who thought I was playing a joke, and Mitchell got Teal'c, who thought Mitchell was playing a joke, then General Landry came in and he got mad at me for tying up the line. I had to tell him three times that we were in lockdown before he believed me, and he kept asking if it was the Wraith. He made me repeat four times that you were possessed by the Go'a'uld."

"Tok'ra," Sam says. It might seem like a fine line between the two, but the distinction is the only reason she's not panicking. 

"Yeah, I clarified and that's when they said they'd call me back." Sheppard looks like he gets this sort of reception from the SGC all the time. "I told them something wasn't right and I figured it would be better if they could see for themselves."

Rodney snaps his fingers at Sheppard. "It's coming through.”

"Colonel Sheppard?" After a mess of static, General Landry appears. "Colonel Carter," he says.

"General," Sheppard and Carter say at the same time.

"I'm still waiting for one of you to tell me this is one of Mitchell's pranks so I can demote him," Landry says. He looks both annoyed and worried.

"It's not a prank, sir," Carter manages.  

"Well, then is this a foothold situation?" 

"No?" Sheppard offers.

"But there's a Go'a'uld in Colonel Carter? Can anyone explain to me how this happened?" Landry says. "My understanding was that there were no Go'a'uld or Tok'ra in the Pegasus Galaxy." Off screen, someone taps General Landry's shoulder. "Good, you're finally here," Landry says to his side. "It's all yours, you try and figure this out."

The Gate Room of the SGC flashes on to the screen, and then the gray hair and blue collar of someone adjusting the angle of the camera.

"Carter," Jack says, as though he can't quite see her.

"I'm here, sir." She only barely stops herself from adding her Napoleonic power mongering is at his service, but no, that was his nickname for Janet. 

"Tell me what's going on," he says.

Sam's eyes flash again.

"So," Jack says, over the static of the video transmission. "This is familiar."

"Yes, a little bit."

"And you haven't tried to take over Atlantis yet? I mean, for evil purposes, you were already legitimately in charge."

"No, sir." 

"Are you drugged, Carter? Is that why I'm not getting your usual 50 dollar word explanation or a theory?"

Dr. Keller steps into the camera's view, leans in. 'We have her mildly sedated, sir. But something's off with her system, her vitals are all over the place and - "

Jack holds up a hand. "Later," he says. "You're sure its a Tok'ra," Jack asks. "You're sure, Carter?"

“I can't understand her – all of it, it's just flashes.”

"So how did this happen?" Jack asks. It's the same question, but the way Jack asks it means he wants a different answer. "Sheppard?" he tries.

"She was captured by the Wraith yesterday."

"You what?" Jack says, like Sheppard just told him she'd stolen a car.

"I think the Wraith had a symbiote, in a captive," Carter says. She's been thinking it, but its the first time speaking theories aloud seemed reasonable.

"The Wraith had a Tok'ra? How did she even get into this galaxy?"

“If the Wraith had the Tok'ra in long-term storage without a host, like Egeria, it would explain why the blending is incomplete,” Keller says.

“There's something else, sir.”

“Spit it out, Carter.”

“She says her name – her host's name was – Janet.”

To Jack's credit, his face remains completely impassive.

“Who's Janet?” Sheppard asks.

“Janet,” Jack repeats, looking only at Sam.

“From the memories she's sharing – it – it looks like her.”

“So, we're talking about.....our Janet? Another universe Janet?”

“She doesn't know me. She's sharing my memories and can recognize her host, but – something's not right.”

“Janet Fraiser? Oh my god,” Keller says softly in the background.

“Mirror universe,” Sheppard says. “Good, those are always a lot of fun.”

“Sheppard," O'Neill barks. Sheppard snaps to attention. "I'm gonna send you a data burst in 15 minutes." he says. 

"Yes, sir," Sheppard says.

“Gimme a minute alone with Carter,” O'Neill says. 

There's a moment when Sam thinks someone will protest at this unchaperoned access to Stargate Command, but Sheppard nods and motions for everyone else to clear out. Even if they don't   
trust her anymore, they trust Jack. 

When the room's empty, except for the two of them and the beeping of Sam's medical monitors, Jack steps in close to the camera.

"Are you OK, Carter?" Jack says, his voice suddenly softer.

"I'm fine, sir," she says, and Jack makes a face.

“You're fine, yes, you look and sound just peachy. You really think it's her?”

“Not our Janet. But a version of her.”

"We've sent a message out to the Tok'ra, we're waiting for them to answer, but you know they're not always the fastest to return our calls. Teal'c's on his way to Atlantis."

"Sir, you didn't need to send - "

"Ah ah ah," Jack says, before Sam can finish her admonishment. "I didn't send Teal'c anywhere. He's catching a ride with a friend. Just like I'm not send Daniel and Mitchell and the charming Ms. Mal Doran on the next Daedalus trip."

"Sir - "

"I don't want to hear it, Carter, if you're going to make a grab for inter-galactic domination, I want the rest of SG-1 there. Whether they'll try to stop you or try to help you is up in the air. They'll help keep you in the loop, even if everyone else is keeping you unlooped.” 

“Yes, sir,” she says.

"O'Neill out." He lingers on for a moment, pretending he doesn't know how to cut the transmission, and Sam can see in the slight quirk of his smile that he just wants to hold her gaze a little longer.


End file.
